Post 653 - The Romans Had a Number for That!

OK, we detest the passage of time, not merely for its relentless, single-direction, but for the implications of age expressed in the randomness of a "year."  21?  30?  50?  Oh the mental gymnastics and the physical contortions we endure to belie the implications of age.  So why not Go Roman?  It's useful for more than expressing copyright dates, right?

For Example:

Up to 10, just do the basics:  I, II, III, IV, V, VI, VII, VIII, IX

Teenage years, they're just rated X, because there's always more imagination before you experience an X rated film, which is so anticlimactic. So to speak

The 20s?  XX! As in Dos Equis! You can legally drink!

30s?  XXX - Triple X - Whatever you haven't done yet, it still has some allure, but it takes work, and may even teach a lesson or two

40s - XL - as in XL-ent!  The last gasps of youth, the harbinger of moyen age, if you will.  Or if you won't.  It doesn't matter.  You're in your 40s, you should know better by now.

50s - a simple L-series here.  Like the old Saturns - reliable, mileage may vary, enough contours to face the onslaught of 

60s - LX - the Luxury series, the Lincolns, the Cadillacs, the sweet tinge of royal vintage

70s - LXX - you've LXX'd it, you've entered the rarefied air, the ultimate strata of delicious relevance

80s - LXXX - The L of triple Xs!  You've made it the way your wanted it.  If the world doesn't like your song, pull out your hearing aids and you can't hear their whining.  The delight of apathy.

90s - XC - as in "I'm too XC for my pants, too XC for my shirt, too XC to change my socks."  You're too XC for Willard Scott's birthday greetings, too, but accept them with grace and straight shots of whatever you want.

100s - C! As in Si! Or, in French, Oui! (pronounced WHEE!) - the world is your bathroom, and you have likely outlived any-and-everyone who could contradict your recollections of a lifetime of adventure.  Make your reality and just giggle at the nay-sayers. 

All time is the right time.

(c) 1988, Jim Middleton, The Animating Apothecary

Postscript (30 April 2025):  Another consideration for signposts in the Third Act - instead of 70, go with sixty-ten!  Ease into it by any means necessary!

In Case I Miss Someone's Birthday

Birthdays come every year, if we're lucky, and I'm notorious in forgetting them all, including mine.  This year, I made a resolution to remember as many as possible, to update a "birthday calendar" to that purpose, and clog the mailboxes of the unsuspecting with bits of paper celebrating our encroaching dotage.
However, I suspect that involving postal carriers in "frivolous distractions" (as almost every one of my outgoing notes should be considered) may not be all that appreciated in this current environment.  To mitigate that only somewhat, I offer this in lieu of cards unsent or undelivered.  If they accumulate in the upcoming weeks (or months), there may be a real tsunami of postage!
Or not.

So get older.  You have my permission:

I heard the gongs at midnight....

Please stick to the snoofers and tringlers and fuzzles,

Or use your pantookas, your dafflers and wuzzles.

But gongs about midnight, I simply can't bear!

It flickers my night light, it pulls at my hair!

So if aging's your thing, and you feel you must grow up,

Skip cheese made of string -- it will just make you throw up.

It's cake that you need, filled with frosting and goo

If cut, it won't bleed, whether one piece or two.

But no gongs, please!  (Apologies to Dr. Seuss!)

Perpetrated by Jim Middleton, 2019 (will need to have something new by August)

Because SOMEONE is having one! (now in THREE versions!)

Video to Flash CS5 for initial title overlay, output as an insanely large Quicktime video, then into Vegas for layering, feathering, and speed adjustment - and then an output to mp4.  Easy peasy!

OK, I can't just let well enough alone - another version, tighter cropping, and one second shorter:

Now that the timing is figured out, it can be used with other variations.  Beware, friends with birthdays!

And, oh heck, another version -

...same lousy piano by the animator...