“I dreamt I was nothing,” began Beatrice, without any warning.
“Nothing?” Calamus was accustomed to acknowledge her declarations without a tone of judgement.
“Nothing. Then I heard a ‘pop’, and everything lit up and I was a cold, hot rock.”
“You offer a simultaneous contradiction.”
“That is proof that I am a genius.”
“I see.”
“I was a cold, hot rock, and I flew into a star, and suddenly, all was dark.”
“Another contradiction?”
“I am not finished.”
“You are expecting a lot out of a rock, Beatrice.”
“And then I was a rock - a meteor - and an ocean on earth at the same time. And the meteor - me - hit the earth and I felt the ocean - also me - turn into steam!”
“So,” Calamus attempted to summarize, “you were a solid, liquid, and a gas almost simultaneously.”
“Yes,” Beatrice said. “What does that mean?”
“That depends. What did you have for dinner last night?”
“Mashed potatoes. Instant mashed potatoes.”
“I means you should probably avoid instant mashed potatoes.”
Beatrice appeared annoyed.
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